The ability to read social clues
"We don't see things as they are. We see things as we are."
People with high EQ are generally more accurate in their ability to perceive and interpret others' emotional, physical and verbal expressions. They also know how to communicate effectively to clarify intentions. Based on the writings of Ronald Adler and Russell Proctor ll, here are a couple of tips to increase the accuracy of reading social clues:
A. When we see an expression from someone that we don't understand fully, come up with at least two possible interpretations before jumping to conclusion. For example, I may be tempted to think my friends not returning my call because he's ignoring me, or I can consider the possibility that he's been very busy. When we avoid personal-zing other people's behaviors, we can perceive their expressions more objectively. People do what they do because of them more than because of us. Widening our perspective on the situation can reduce the possibility of misunderstanding.
"A negative look from someone else may mean nothing more than they're constipated!"
B. Seek clarification when needed. If necessary, inquire with the other person for clarification on why she's behaving the way she does. Ask opened ended questions such as: "I'm just curious, can you tell me why.., " and avoid accusations and judgments. Compare that person's words with body language and behavior to check for congruency.
4. The ability to be assertive and express difficult emotions when necessary
"Being who we are requires that we can talk openly about things that are important to us, that we take a clear position on where we stand on important emotional issues, and that we clarify the limits of what is acceptable and tolerable to us in a relationship."
My name is D'or. I am a successful entrepreneur, mother keynote speaker and business woman who is confident, principle centered and character based. I am a mature woman with an
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